Murphy's law

• You will always find something in the last place you look.
• No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it, it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.
• The other line always moves faster.
• In order to get a loan, you must first prove you don't need it.
• Anything you try to fix will take longer and cost you more than you thought.
• If you fool around with a thing for very long you will screw it up.
• If it jams - force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
• When a broken appliance is demonstrated for the repairman, it will work perfectly.
• Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will use it.
• Everyone has a scheme for getting rich that will not work.
• In any hierarchy, each individual rises to his own level of incompetence, and then remains there.
• There's never time to do it right, but there's always time to do it over.
• When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate.
• Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral or fattening.
• Murphy's golden rule: whoever has the gold makes the rules.
• Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
• A Smith & Wesson beats four aces.
• In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
• If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which something can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop.
• Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
• If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
• Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.
• Every solution breeds new problems
• You never run out of things that can go wrong.
• If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.
• An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing.
• A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.